PCS in Paris

During the summer holidays, when Jørgine and me were playing pétanque in the south of France, the thought occured to me that it would be nice to play in France with the members of the club.
Because it is different playin' in France then at home. Once at home i asked before i took the bull by the horns. 29 of our members were quite enthousiastic. I started to sent e-mails around and it was the President of ASJL, Olivier Heckenroth who reported, and the correspondence was a fact.
We were invited for a tournement on the 23 of april. Mails went over and back, because not only me had to organize but Olivier as well. I owe a lot to Olivier for taking care of business on the French side.
Now i only had to organize transportation and a location to sleep. Lots of bids were asked, but none of the proposals suited the budget. I also gathered information to rent mini-busses and the rent of vacation houses. This seemed more like it. Another member of our club indicated to me to gather information with organized bustravels as well.

For several weeks i surfed over the world wide web. With the "enter" button under my left thumb and the phone in my right hand i barely could push the spacebar with my tow. At Peter Langhout it seemed like i was at the right address. They promised me mountains of gold at a ridiculous price. In fact, it was to good to be true. For days i phoned the company and over and over again they confirmed al my questions. When all 1001 questions were answered i finaly booked. In the mean time the contact with Olivier went undiminished along. Olivier arranged a lovely diner for us, but one doesn't like meat and the other doesn't like fish. The restaurant owner must be gone completely mad by now.
One week before we are going i have a final conversation with Olivier and we are looking forward seeing each other.

At 02.00 in the morning of the 22 of april i am already a busy bee. Have we got everything? Nothing forgotten? Check everything for the 5th time. Although i agreed to pick-up Ida 10 past three i already stood for her door at half past two. Luckely she was ready to go, suitcase in the trunk and off to erica to pick-up Wim. The lights are on, so he is awake. It is fortyfive past two and his dog must let entire Erica know strangers have arrived. In all my might i try the yapping bowl of fur to keep its mouth shut. It doesn't take long before i gain its confidence and the rest returns. In the middle of the night were goin' back to Schoonebeek. Nobody arrived yet at town hall and i phone several people of which i know they have trouble leaving their bed. Hans Louw doesn't pick-up the phone and i decide to drive by and see for myself if they are awake. When i enter the street i see that they are loading the suitcases in the trunk of Jan's car. Ok, everybody is awake. Afterwards it doesn't take long before the parkinglot is crowded. I walk towards the crossing to see if the bus is coming. When i stand on the crossing i am afraid the occupants will ring the police, because it is very noisy. They are talking and laughing louder and louder. In the always quiet community Schoonebeek the quietness is rudely disturbed this morning. Their all adults, but it seems more like 112 schoolkids who are goin' on a schooltrip. My god, what a noise. The baker whois going to his work stops by to see what the heck is going on. The bus is to late and i am ringing the emergency number of Peter Langhout. She will call right back. When the phone rings she teels me she spoke to the driver and he is coming within 10 minutes. Many phonecalls later he will still be there within 10 minutes. Meanwhile it is past five o'clock and two policeofficers are a little afraid when they encouter this raging groupe of pétanqueplayers. The girls get out off the car, smoke a cigarette and make small talk with us. They keep the motor running so that we can warm up a little one at a time. Betsy sits in the back and can't come out again. She surely never sat in a policecar before, otherwise she had known the backseet is the place to transport criminals and they may not get off along the way to the policestation.

After spending over two hours in the freezing cold finaly the bus arrives. The driver tells us he overslept and that's that, no excuse, no nothing. The suitcases are loaded on the bus and we take off to Hoogeveen.......via Coevorden. That can't be done, because the raod is closed. Were goin'all the way past Dalen over tiny roads and we are shaken like a milkshake. For those who were not entirely awake yet, now you are.

In Hoogeveen Henk takes over the wheel. We are told the coffee is his and not his boss' so we have to pay for the coffee. het stuur over en laat direct weten dat de koffie van hem zelf is en niet van zijn baas, dus we moeten gewoon betalen voor een bak koffie. Hans Maatje raises himself as a coffee magnate and makes sure everybody gets a cup. Half an hour later he finaly can enjoy one himself. In Ede Henk lost track and tries to read the map en drive at the same time. I am going to the front of the bus and read the map for him. When we are on the right side of the pick-up point i see my chance clear. When he loads the suitcases i light a cigarette, but he is fast and i can only take 7 drags before he mounts the bus again. We are going on, Nijmegen, Oss, 's Hertogenbosch and finaly Eindhoven. We have to change busses here. At the frontdesk i ask one of the girls on which bus we are, so i can make arrangements with the driver when we are in Paris. The bitch sighs to me i have to wait like everyone else until it is called. After a while it is called we are on bus number 8 and we can make acquaintance with Jos.

We are only just on the road and Jos makes jokes. With a driver like that it is going to be nice, i thought then. Along the way i make acquaintance with Jos and tell him our program. 10 minutes later i was completely disillusioned and thinking of heavy bomb attacking on Peter Langhout. Our entire program is flushed. How do i tell our members? Instead of leaving Paris at 18.00 houres on Sunday we are leaving at noon. This was just the reason why i choose for Peter Langhout, because all other travelagencies told me they went home at noon. All i ever wanted was to create an extra day in Paris for sightseeing. No problem!!, the excessively nice telephoneoperators told me. After the money is in the bank they have entirely different plans with you. After i have spoken with Jos i get my doubts. Are we traveling with a touroperator or is this cattle transport?

Of course we are way to late in Paris, we have to shove our dinner in because we are already late for a boattrip. We are so late that the promissed lighttour can't go on. Ok, this is cattle transport. The mood didn't get any better when we were dropped in the middle of nowhere with the message mister Jos can't get any closer to the hotel. We have to walk quit a distance with the luggage before we reach the hotel. At this time i get the next surprise, The hotelowner has only three rooms with seperate beds and i ordered six. In the hope the members aren't going to skin me i give the keys to the rooms at random. In the room i yank a bottle of rum from the suitcase and drink to my misery alone. I have no comment on the hotel or the rooms, everything is spick and span.

Saturdaymorning i wake up at 05.00. I have to go to the bathroom and take a peek outside. I lie down again, but i can't sleep no more. At 06.15 i leave the bed and smoke a cigarette at the window. At 06.25 it starts raining cats and dogs. I have had it! Is this freakin'trip condamned? I also have a bottle of Cognac in my suitcase and i am thinking weater i will take this bottle with me and drink it while i seek shelter somewhere under a bridge. What's next? If the third worldwar brakes out today we have it all. At breakfast everybody is cheerfull, but i have a guitly feeling. Everyone is trying to cheer me up. After a crummy breakfast we all go to the bus in clubtenue. At the pick-up point i decide to film a little. Across the street i notice a bakery and don't hesitate to buy a chocolat eclair. Mayby not so nice because i see everyone drewling when i eat my eclair with taste on the bus. We are dropped at the mainentrance of Jardin du Luxembourg. I told Jos that we will meet ASJL at the entrance of Rue Guynemer, but according to Jos this was a narrow street where he couldn't come with the bus. When we walked through the entire park we have a view on Rue Guynemer and have to confront ourselfs that coaches are coming and going. Asshole!!

The meeting with Olivier whom i have corresponded with all this time becomes a fact. While we are on the court the sun is breaking through. The teams were allready made, so actually i am throwing a little oil on the fire by saying we want to play mixed. The names of the participants are throwne through each other and afterwards the tournament can begin. We are classified in poules and i have to play with Jans and Theresa. We are litteraly sweeped from the court. Also the second game we get deepfried. Then it is lunchtime. Goodness Gracious!! The lunch is not prepared with half measures. First there is an aperitif. It not only looks good, it taste delicious as well. I rinse with a delicious Pastis and meanwhile the real lunch is served. Several kind of salades, all kind of meats, paté, meatballs, bread. Litteraly too much to taste everything. A good glass of wine on the side and the weekend is great again. Homage to the chef and homage to ASJL for the organisation. It is quite alright that we can take five before we have to throw again. As dessert they throw in a cheese plate, but i can't anymore.
The next two matches we can't win either and we are done. The refery comes to me and say that one of our teams is playing the finals. Great!! And nice too, perhaps we can drag along a cup from the France soil. We have to wait quiet a while because the semi-finales are due first. When we are all watching the finales begin. after a couple of rounds it is already 0-13, but we are assured of a cup, because they came in second. When the prizes are called we get another surprise, cause the teams of Grietje en Jørgine get each a medal.

Afterwards we are going to the restaurant Chevalier d'Assas. I can't imagine anyone is hungry, but Olivier arranged a lovely three course diner for us. Unfortionaly both clubs are seated seperately, that was not the meaning of this joined dinner. To excess of calamity i get to receive a gift certificate as well for this monster journey and the guilt feeling starts to gnaw again. Anyhow, this day made it worth all the trouble, this is where we went for, but i am still annoyed for not living up to my promisses.
When we return to the hotel at night with a citybus there are hardly any passengers. I make smalltalk with the driver and he dicides to deliver us on the front side of the hotel. At this time all sort of images flashes before my eyes. Jos on a rope, Jos under the guillotine, set Jos on fire, saw Jos in halfs, use Jos as u dartboard, let Jos eats his own bus, etc. I can't think of anything less atrocious. When we get off the bus i see the taxi arriving where i put Fennie, Ida and Marchien in. Did they take a scenic route? At the restaurant the driver already told me it was his first night, so they have seen entire Paris by night. And that in the meantime we walked towards the busstop, waited at the busstop and drove with the bus. In the bar of the hotel we celibrate the victory. Jenne shares her cup with the hotel owner, which is filled with Whisky at the moment.

The next day everybody is one time at breakfast and we enjoy for the last time a crummy French breakfast. With a couple of other passengers we agree that we want to be dropped at the Eiffel tower. With us almost 44 people. Jos however does what he wants and droppes us of at the Pantheon. We take bus 82 and leave for the Eiffel tower anyhow. I had to gather at least 20 people in order to visit the tower at the group entrance. Unfortionately only 18 want to go up, so no go. We walk through the park to shoot some group pictures. With bus 82 we return to the Pantheon and we have to prepare ourselfs for a long journey home. In Eindhoven we switch busses again and get to meet other people who visited Paris as well. They told us that their driver Hans mentioned a lot to them. He took the initiative to create an extra excursion to Montparnasse. He talked the entire trip through and gave them lots and lots of information. I am being confronted with visions again: Jos on a rope, Jos under the guillotine, set Jos on fire, saw Jos in halfs, use Jos as u dartboard, let Jos eats his own bus, etc.

In the middle of the night we arrive in Schoonebeek and everyone is going his own way. Everyone is beaten by the bush i think. Mondaymorning i write a complaint letter with all details and takes almost four pages. I will get Jos' testicles on a platter. Jos came from Stir-mouth (Roermond), but Jos didn't stir his mouth and when he stirred rubbish came out. In the mean time everybody received the new Pétanque in the mailbox. There is an add from a club from Rouen who wishes an exchange program with Dutch clubs. For those who are interested.... i give up. I am healed of organising.